RIAA to Limewire: 72 Trillion Dollars Please

The Recording Industry Association of America has halted all attempts at modesty and concealed rage when attacking ex-file-sharing giant LimeWire, which was shut down in late 2010; claiming they’re owed $72 trillion in damages. That is, in layman’s terms, literally all the money in the world.

Judge Kimba Woods, who is presiding over the case, unsurprisingly called the figure “absurd”, pointing out how it is “more money than the entire music recording industry has made since Edison’s invention of the phonograph in 1877″.

The claim was the result of LimeWire hosting at least 11,000 “infringed” songs, which have each likely been downloaded thousands of times. In pointing this out, the RIAA no doubt attempts to create the image of a giant, evil supercomputer, hauling a sack full of $72 trillion dollars back to its lair somewhere within the matrix, leaving the glossy-eyed recording artists impoverished and starving.

The reality, as everyone reading this likely knows, is that some people get lazy and annoyed when they’re missing that one bonus track from the latest Spice Girls album – or whatever it is the young kids are listening to these days – and instead hop on to the internet for a free download.

It appears that in trying to show the damage of illegal downloads, the RIAA have done nothing but damage their own reputation, opening themselves up to all sorts ridicule and, obligatorily, comparisons to Dr. Evil.

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About Josh Gripton

Josh is an English student currently studying English Literature with Creative Writing at University in the UK. When he's not wasting time acquiring the grappling beam in Super Metroid, you'll find him being far more productive - listening to Black Sabbath and reading comics. He hopes his work at The Silver Tongue will help him get his writing out to the public and professional world, heaven forbid.